Voltadrig is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, thoughtless mink.

Voltadrig created the planet Jupiter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Voltadrig, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Voltadrig, she will turn you into a snail.

Voltadrig's most sacred site is Anony in Madagascar.

Voltadrig's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to gulls while wearing turquoise skirts.

2. Run away from pink snakes, for they are unholy.

3. Always look after injured otters.

4. Never sing in holy places.

5. Goats are not to be trusted.