Motgodbest is a god.

She takes the form of a heavy, emotional wombat.

Motgodbest created a top quark two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Motgodbest, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Motgodbest, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Motgodbest's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Motgodbest's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate goats.

2. Always make sure there are no ants in a room before entering it.

3. Do not drink water in black rooms.

4. Never write about amino acids.

5. Always help sick pigs.