Tifvabbun is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, emotional jellyfish.

Tifvabbun created the planet Jupiter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tifvabbun, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Tifvabbun, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Tifvabbun's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Tifvabbun's Holy Commandments

1. Voles are not to be trusted.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never wear ear rings.

5. Do not commit murder.