Vendisslad is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, compassionate penguin.

Vendisslad created energy two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vendisslad, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Vendisslad, she will throw large rocks at you.

Vendisslad's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Vendisslad's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your feet pink.

2. Never hurt moths.

3. Never eat turnips.

4. Never laugh in the presence of doves.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.