Gabzotpop is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, merciful goat.

Gabzotpop created the Whirlpool Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gabzotpop, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gabzotpop, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Gabzotpop's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Gabzotpop's Holy Commandments

1. Erect seven lead sculptures of Gabzotpop on top of important buildings.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.