Kipfunflab is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, loving cat.

Kipfunflab created snails five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kipfunflab, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kipfunflab, he will turn you into a dog.

Kipfunflab's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Kipfunflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity.

2. Always make sure there are no seals in a room before entering it.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Never talk about ants.

5. Grasshopers are not to be trusted.