Ripzestpop is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish spider.

Ripzestpop created the Tadpole Galaxy two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ripzestpop, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Ripzestpop, she will attempt to scare you with floods.

Ripzestpop's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Ripzestpop's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sing in public.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Never talk about dolphins.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Do not cook food in pots.