Stanjamlak is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, cheerful zebra.

Stanjamlak created the Sunflower Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Stanjamlak, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Stanjamlak, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Stanjamlak's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Stanjamlak's Holy Commandments

1. Always help sick birds.

2. Retreat if seven mice approach from the south.

3. Put Stanjamlak first in all things.

4. Always take life seriously.

5. Never mention ducks.