Zagfutkin is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, annoying hamster.

Zagfutkin created carbon two million years ago.

If you believe in Zagfutkin, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Zagfutkin, she will turn you into a duck.

Zagfutkin's most sacred site is Hondarribia in Spain.

Zagfutkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about asteroids.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Do not shave your chest.

5. Always take life seriously.