Ortdamjip is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, capable dugong.

Ortdamjip created the Sun seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ortdamjip, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ortdamjip, she will turn you into a mouse.

Ortdamjip's most sacred site is Acanceh in Mexico.

Ortdamjip's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from black pigs for they are unholy.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not trade with those who eat coconuts.

5. You must love Ortdamjip.