Bitsadhom is a god.

It takes the form of a slim, narcissistic fairy.

Bitsadhom created Europe four billion years ago.

If you believe in Bitsadhom, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Bitsadhom, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bitsadhom's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Bitsadhom's Holy Commandments

1. Bitsadhom must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not dye your hair purple.

5. Do not kill whales.