Bepgepkom is a god.

She takes the form of a large, thoughtless jackal.

Bepgepkom created humankind two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bepgepkom, she will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bepgepkom, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Bepgepkom's most sacred site is Rutalahti in Finland.

Bepgepkom's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no voles in a building before entering it.

2. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bepgepkom.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never mention tortoises.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.