Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass is a god.

She takes the form of a huge, capable ferret.

Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass created vertebrates seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass' most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Lakzogvidquamgonzimbass' Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of zinc.

2. Never talk about fire.

3. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

4. Never wear pink hats.

5. Seals are not to be trusted.