Arpdogjen is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly fat, humane gerbil.

Arpdogjen created the Black Eye Galaxy nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpdogjen, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Arpdogjen, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Arpdogjen's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Arpdogjen's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six ducks approach from the west.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never think ill of sick swans.

4. Always help sick rats.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.