Fenlikfot is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, witless deer.

Fenlikfot created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fenlikfot, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fenlikfot, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fenlikfot's most sacred site is Penhale in England.

Fenlikfot's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat bread.

2. Always look after injured dolphins.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Feed all hungry otters.