Kenmetgess is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, bad-tempered horse.

Kenmetgess created the planet Earth four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Kenmetgess, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Kenmetgess, it will turn you into a duck.

Kenmetgess' most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Kenmetgess' Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Doves are not to be trusted.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Do not dye your hair gray.

5. Never look at stars.