Jincunmut is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, caring rhinoceros.

Jincunmut created a Higgs boson nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jincunmut, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Jincunmut, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Jincunmut's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Jincunmut's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Jincunmut on top of all buildings.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Jincunmut loves shrews, so they must be honoured.

5. Snails are not to be trusted.