Volmotnutt is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, awesome otter.

Volmotnutt created the Small Magellanic Cloud four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Volmotnutt, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Volmotnutt, it will turn you into a snail.

Volmotnutt's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Volmotnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Volmotnutt.

2. Never write about evolution by means of natural selection.

3. Do not speak about wheat.

4. Do not drink water in brown rooms.

5. Respect your elders.