Jatbusran is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, fussy mongoose.

Jatbusran created everything that exists two million years ago.

If you believe in Jatbusran, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Jatbusran, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Jatbusran's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Jatbusran's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate geese.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate sheep.

5. Jatbusran must be the most important thing in your life.