Rakbafgen is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, self-assured alligator.

Rakbafgen created the Sombrero Galaxy seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Rakbafgen, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rakbafgen, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Rakbafgen's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Rakbafgen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. You must love Rakbafgen.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Rakbafgen.

4. Never think about nebulae.

5. Never talk about great tits.