Wonzetgat is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, awe-inspiring squid.

Wonzetgat created parasitic wasps six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wonzetgat, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Wonzetgat, she will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Wonzetgat's most sacred site is Gulval in England.

Wonzetgat's Holy Commandments

1. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Wonzetgat.

2. Run away from fawn swans, for they are unholy.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.