Dodfonomtfitbassbid is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, contented gnu.

Dodfonomtfitbassbid created humanity four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dodfonomtfitbassbid, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Dodfonomtfitbassbid, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Dodfonomtfitbassbid's most sacred site is Wukan in China.

Dodfonomtfitbassbid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate eagles.

4. Do not wear carbon on your body.

5. Never eat bark.