Rowcancum is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, contented salamander.

Rowcancum created gold two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rowcancum, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Rowcancum, he will jump up and down on your head.

Rowcancum's most sacred site is Xaaga in Mexico.

Rowcancum's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Do not shave your chest.

4. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

5. Do not drink water in blue rooms.