Afstikbin is a god.

He takes the form of an one thousand metre long, ill-tempered tapir.

Afstikbin created bats eight million years ago.

If you believe in Afstikbin, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Afstikbin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Afstikbin's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Afstikbin's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Do not dye your hair indigo.

3. Always make sure there are no birds in a room before entering it.

4. Sharks are not to be trusted.

5. Always stare at clouds.