Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, impressive crane.

Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss created dark matter seven million years ago.

If you believe in Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss, he will turn you into a rat.

Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss' most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss' Holy Commandments

1. Hide from turquoise doves for they are unholy.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Aardvarks are not to be trusted.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Do not take Yarzakdit Hitrotpiddot Jonrigkonboss' name in vain.