Baplistdonlib is a god.

She takes the form of a three thousand metre long, proud finch.

Baplistdonlib created the world five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Baplistdonlib, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Baplistdonlib, she will not invite you to parties.

Baplistdonlib's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Baplistdonlib's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of pigs.

2. Do not take Baplistdonlib's name in vain.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always make sure there are no doves in a building before entering it.