Jamlegnurl is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, unsympathetic elephant.

Jamlegnurl created energy two million years ago.

If you believe in Jamlegnurl, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Jamlegnurl, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Jamlegnurl's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Jamlegnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about amino acids.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Never write about cell theory.