Bassxinflab is a god.

He takes the form of a five hundred metre long, benevolent turtle.

Bassxinflab created the Milkyway four million years ago.

If you believe in Bassxinflab, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Bassxinflab, he will destroy your home galaxy.

Bassxinflab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Bassxinflab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about cucumbers.

2. Never wear dresses.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Do not eat onions.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.