Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, witless goat.

Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim created humankind six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim, he will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Larpgatdossmegfedkaplim's Holy Commandments

1. Never sit in holy places.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never paint your back indigo.

4. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.