Hadmutsin is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, competent hamster.

Hadmutsin created a down quark five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hadmutsin, he will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Hadmutsin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Hadmutsin's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Hadmutsin's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt pigs.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Hadmutsin must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Never write about nebulae.