Lakgudlikcep is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, witty toad.

Lakgudlikcep created light nine million years ago.

If you believe in Lakgudlikcep, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Lakgudlikcep, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Lakgudlikcep's most sacred site is Leps in Germany.

Lakgudlikcep's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Never think ill of sick pigs.

3. Never look at nebulae.

4. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.