Midzogbum is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, annoying cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Midzogbum created a strange quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Midzogbum, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Midzogbum, she will cry a lot.

Midzogbum's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Midzogbum's Holy Commandments

1. Midzogbum must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Never wear shoes.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Feed all hungry squirrels.

5. Always pray immersed in water.