Arfyimstip is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, sage gerbil.

Arfyimstip created the Cigar Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arfyimstip, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Arfyimstip, he will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Arfyimstip's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Arfyimstip's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Do not speak about bananas.

3. Run away from black mites, for they are unholy.

4. Put Arfyimstip first in all things.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.