Tallapmut is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, bad-tempered penguin.

Tallapmut created the Sol system seven million years ago.

If you believe in Tallapmut, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tallapmut, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Tallapmut's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Tallapmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip near porpoises.

2. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always treat grasshopers with great respect.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.