Tiklogjop is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, self-confident snake.

Tiklogjop created viruses six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tiklogjop, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Tiklogjop, he will send two she bears to sort you out.

Tiklogjop's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Tiklogjop's Holy Commandments

1. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Do not dye your hair red.

4. Never feed cherries to squirrels while wearing orange rings.

5. Never wear skirts.