Mitbudken is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, compassionate jaguar.

Mitbudken created the cosmos five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mitbudken, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Mitbudken, she will think nothing of it.

Mitbudken's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Mitbudken's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.