Mutbidfot is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, unsympathetic seal.

Mutbidfot created humankind two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Mutbidfot, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Mutbidfot, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Mutbidfot's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Mutbidfot's Holy Commandments

1. Mutbidfot loves pigs, so they must be respected.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not sing in public.

4. Do not cook food in pots.

5. Never run in the presence of rats.