Fubfidcen Gilortcut is a god.

He takes the form of a large, quiet guinea pig.

Fubfidcen Gilortcut created matter twelve years ago.

If you believe in Fubfidcen Gilortcut, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Fubfidcen Gilortcut, he will turn you into a mouse.

Fubfidcen Gilortcut's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Fubfidcen Gilortcut's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Worship no other gods but Fubfidcen Gilortcut.

3. Never play with disobedient children.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never think ill of sick tapirs.