Bemnanmit is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, humane cow.

Bemnanmit created energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bemnanmit, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Bemnanmit, it will strike you with lightening.

Bemnanmit's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Bemnanmit's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the weak nuclear force.

2. Never think ill of sick dogs.

3. Always look after injured frogs.

4. Do not sing in public.

5. Never hurt turtles.