Stikmitbat is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, resourceful dingo.

Stikmitbat created Asia four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stikmitbat, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Stikmitbat, he will remove you from existence.

Stikmitbat's most sacred site is Littoinen in Finland.

Stikmitbat's Holy Commandments

1. Always help ducks in need.

2. Never talk about asteroids.

3. Hide from violet manatees for they are unholy.

4. Always obey Stikmitbat's priests.

5. Never write about the strong nuclear force.