Figarnpad is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humorless troll.

Figarnpad created the Sombrero Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Figarnpad, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Figarnpad, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Figarnpad's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Figarnpad's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat corn.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Ducks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.