Tonbonkarf is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, blissful shrew.

Tonbonkarf created the Cigar Galaxy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonbonkarf, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Tonbonkarf, he will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Tonbonkarf's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Tonbonkarf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not sit in public.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never wear stockings.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate cats.