Tonknigzem is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, amazing wolf.

Tonknigzem created a top quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Tonknigzem, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Tonknigzem, he will come to you in dreams.

Tonknigzem's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Tonknigzem's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Do not wear fawn clothing.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Never talk about comets.

5. Never laugh near sheep.