Ladsadvonkyam is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, clever crab.

Ladsadvonkyam created the world seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ladsadvonkyam, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Ladsadvonkyam, she will strike you with lightening.

Ladsadvonkyam's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Ladsadvonkyam's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if three sheep approach from the west.

2. Never write about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Retreat if nine cats approach from the east.

5. Do not wear carbon on your body.