Fidflabmat is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, clever dog.

Fidflabmat created humanity seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Fidflabmat, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Fidflabmat, he will try to impress you with trees.

Fidflabmat's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Fidflabmat's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Fidflabmat.

2. Never laugh near nematodes.

3. Never eat gooseberries.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of lead.

5. Put Fidflabmat first in all things.