Rutsantun Hatbatcuss is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, cheerful lizard.

Rutsantun Hatbatcuss created oxygen nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rutsantun Hatbatcuss, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Rutsantun Hatbatcuss, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Rutsantun Hatbatcuss' most sacred site is Ringsted in Denmark.

Rutsantun Hatbatcuss' Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never think about the strong nuclear force.

3. Always stare at clouds.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Never look in ponds.