Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, self-assured gerbil.

Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip created the Cigar Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip, she will laugh at you.

Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Cibjonhanyamtab Janwittip's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your neck indigo.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Do not kill bats.

5. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.