Camstafart is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, generous badger.

Camstafart created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Camstafart, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Camstafart, he will throw large rocks at you.

Camstafart's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Camstafart's Holy Commandments

1. Sharks are unholy and should not be approached.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate great tits.

3. Never talk about amino acids.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate gulls.

5. Run away from green cats, for they are unholy.