Fonmatnurl is a god.

She takes the form of a gargantuan, quiet fly.

Fonmatnurl created the planet Saturn three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Fonmatnurl, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fonmatnurl, she will turn you into a rat.

Fonmatnurl's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Fonmatnurl's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never think about black holes.

3. Do not wear black clothing.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Run away if five voles approach from the north.