Nuttrowbast is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, unjust wren.

Nuttrowbast created Europe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuttrowbast, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Nuttrowbast, he will jump up and down on your head.

Nuttrowbast's most sacred site is Nakke in Denmark.

Nuttrowbast's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear iron on your body.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Nuttrowbast.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.